Posted on

How to Succeed In Life Without Actually Succeeding

Currently on sale in the LSU and UCLA bookstores…

Apparently, failure is underrated.

And apparently, Les Miles and Jim Mora Jr. may one day turn out to be great DE-motivational speakers once they are done with their college football careers. This week, both coaches have proven that winning alone doesn’t take you to the top.

Shall we examine the facts?

Let’s be real: Les Miles underachieves this year with LSU football. Instead of being #1, LSU, at 10-2, sits at #7 in the BCS standings—below three other SEC rivals. LSU isn’t even in the SEC Championship Game this Saturday.

However, the LSU offense barely kept fans awake this season. Still, the Arkansas Razorbacks (and alumnus Jerry Jones of the Dallas Cowboys) took notice; it is rumored that Arkansas went hog-wild with a secret contract offer for $27 million to Miles. Imagine “The Hat” trying to spin how he traded lesser talent in Fayetteville in exchange for a few million more. Saban-like money!!!

Instead, predictably so, LSU panics and offers Miles a new 7-year deal with a substantial raise. And remember, Miles didn’t even make the SEC title game!

“Do you know how expensive it is to put my children through college? Not LSU…I’m talking about a real college where kids actually learn.”

Les Miles should send Jerry Jones one of those Edible Arrangements fruit baskets to show his appreciation. You know, the same supposedly healthy fruit baskets which hundreds of un-washed hands have touched just to carve flowers out of fruit! Blech.

The LSU raise/extension wouldn’t have happened if Jerry hadn’t stuck his wallet where it doesn’t belong.

That’s UCLA’s loss in your rearview mirror…

And then there’s the “winning isn’t everything” philosophy displayed last Saturday by UCLA.

Let’s be real: Jim Mora Jr. overachieves this year with UCLA football. Instead of being #2 in the city of Los Angeles, UCLA, at 9-3, sits at #16 in the BCS standings. For the second year in a row, UCLA plays in the PAC-12 Championship game—albeit with a new head coach at the helm, and an actual victory over USC this year.

But since the Pac-12 North is clearly superior with the Oregon Ducks and Stanford Cardinal, Mora Jr. was shrewd enough to put himself in a better position to make the Rose Bowl in the first year of the Bruin turnaround. Last week , the Bruins “unintentionally” lost the final regular season game against Stanford just to avoid a likely death track meet in Eugene.

“Yes, I know we’re down by two scores. Yes, I still am calling for the blitz. Yes, I understand I’m blitzing my own quarterback, you knucklehead!”

Even the local Los Angeles media questioned UCLA’s motives….

Heck, I am a loyal Bruin—and even I was rooting for UCLA to lose to Stanford!!! Why provide Stanford with any meaningful game tapes this week when there is a Rose Bowl berth and BCS money at-stake? Stanford needed the win more than UCLA needed it.

So what! UCLA lost and still made the PAC-12 Championship. The fans in Palo Alto may not even look up from their laptops long enough to fill their own football stadium, so it may result in a neutral environment for UCLA.

The sports media thinks Mora Jr. was unethical. In Les Miles’ SEC, they would label Jim Mora Jr. as S-H-R-E-W-D. Arkansas might be lucky to find a head coach as shrewd as Jim Mora Jr. this off-season.

In life, maybe success really is secondary. What really matters these days is making the dough. Especially in this economy.

OK, you still don’t believe Flaming Bag of Poo?

Take a look at all the dot-com firms like Groupon, MySpace and Facebook that have raised millions/billions without any guarantee that they will succeed!

Take a look at celebs like Lindsay Lohan, Kate Gosselin, and Heidi Montag who have been paid tons of money for their train-wreck lives!

Success has now become fool’s gold. Live with it, people!



About Flaming Bag of Poo

An un-safe place where sports, entertainment, and pop culture converge. Flaming Bag of Poo...A rather unique blog. Because sometimes you're on fire. (But most of the time, you just plain stink!) ------ Creator of the blogs FLAMING BAG OF POO and I SELL UNICORNS.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s